Why I Chose to be a Stay-at-Home-Mom

As a child and a teenager, I always knew that I wanted to be a stay-at-home-mommy while my kids were young. I was the kind of teenager who instead of going out partying and staying out til the early morning, would rather stay in with my high school sweetheart and watch a movie or at most, go out to see a movie. Everywhere I went, if there was a pregnant woman there, I would stare in amazement at her adorable belly and dream of the day that I too would be knocked up. High school girl looking forward to the day she’ll be knocked up…. every parent’s nightmare right?

I loved working as a daycare educator. It didn’t really feel like a job where you can’t wait for the weekend and dread Monday mornings. I got to play Mommy all day! However, when I did indeed get knocked up with not one but two babies, I could not bear the thought of returning to work. I know some women look forward to returning to their jobs and getting back some grown-up time after a long 12 months of baby talk and wearing food-stained clothes, but not this lady.

When I did return to work for almost a year while the boys were 3-years-old and my husband was in graduate school, I hated every minute of it. The boys were enrolled in the same daycare I worked at but in a different class and I just could not get used to the fact that I would be spending all day pouring all my love and energy into taking care of other people’s kids while watching them grow up from afar . With every sickness my kids would contract, which was A LOT considering it was their first time in daycare, my husband would have to leave work and stay with them because I couldn’t afford to miss any work hours. It broke my heart to not be able to nurse my children back to health and give them cuddles in their time of need. My husband and I made the decision together, that it was better for our family if I stayed home.

Yes, our budget is smaller. No, we don’t get to go on yearly vacations. No, we don’t own our own house. Yes, we are living off a student line of credit. There are sacrifices we have to make in order to live like this, but I think it’s all worth it. I can always go back to work when all my kids are in school. We will get to go on more vacations later on in life. We will eventually be able to buy a house. But my kids will only be kids for a short time and I want to soak it all up before it’s over. I will not regret missed time with my children later on in life. I will make it my goal, to give my kids a happy and memorable childhood because later when their lives are filled with adult responsibilities or when their mommy and daddy are gone, that is what they will remember about us.

 

 

 

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A weekend without hubby

It’s Saturday. I hear Avery waking up and fussing. I look at my phone, it’s 6:15 AM. I’m very happy, the night was successful. He only woke up once at 4:15 AM and I was able to just lay him back down and give him his pacifier. I walk over to his crib, pick him up, give him a kiss, and we start our day.

  • I nurse and change Avery’s diaper
  • Go upstairs for morning cuddles with the boys
  • Make an awesome breakfast with the boys

 

  • Feed kids
  • Empty dishwasher
  • Clean up kitchen
  • Run downstairs to change my sheets and put a load of washing on, while the boys watch TV and the baby plays with toys
  • Run back upstairs and argue with boys to close TV and play a bit
  • Give Avery a bath, massage, and dress him
  • Get boys downstairs to dress, brush teeth, and make their beds
  • Go back upstairs to put a movie on for boys, so I can put Avery down for his morning nap
  • Complete our nap-time routine (brush teeth, read a book, put him in his sleep bag, rock him for 2 songs), and put Avery down

Now it’s time for me to shower and get ready for the day (but I’m so tired, and it’s only 9:00 AM)

What to do with the rest of the day….

My mom was out-of-town for the weekend, so I decided to go stay at her house for the day. My grandmother came over to spend time with us and help me out with the kids.

This was NOT a good day! The boys started fighting in the car, on the way to my mom’s. I had to do time-outs as soon as we arrived. They continued fighting. I decided to take them to the park, to run around and burn off some energy. As soon as we got there, they started begging me to leave. “I’m thirsty”, they said. “It’s too hot”, they said. “It’s so boring at the park”, they said. I tortured them for another 45 minutes before leaving, so that Avery could nap a bit while we were out of the house.

Finally back at my mom’s house….

Avery had not gone down for my grandmother. The boys were begging me to go swimming in my mom’s 72 degree pool. They lasted 10 minutes. The rest of the afternoon was filled with fighting over whose turn it was to choose the next TV show (even though they tend to watch the same show, it’s important to know whose turn it is to hold the TV control), singing in the karaoke machine microphones (whose volume they kept on raising the moment I would walk away after lowering it), and playing with Avery, but forgetting that he’s not 6 years old.

Bedtime could not come sooner today. I finally got all 3 kids to bed by 8:00 and was on the couch watching Velvet (so perfect for when you’re without your hubby).

Tomorrow will be a better day!

Sunday was all about the boys. As soon as Avery woke up from his morning nap, we left to make our way back to Laval. It was a rainy day, so we went to SUBWAY for lunch and then to Funtropolis, an indoor amusement center. My sister-in-law came with us to help me out. The boys had so much fun. I almost had to drag them out 4.5 hours later.

 

After having supper at my grandmother’s, we went back home for bedtime. The boys were asleep before their heads hit the pillow, thank you Funtropolis!

All in all, it was a tough weekend. A tiring weekend. The kind of weekend that is both physically and emotionally draining. The kind of weekend that brings you to tears and makes you cheat on your diet. But before going to bed, when I check in on all my sleeping boys, looking like angels, I am so filled with love and content. I’m ready for tomorrow!